Denial

There's too much that goes on in my head that I ignore on a daily basis.
And I very well could have kept it buried,
if it hadn't been for that dream I had.

And this is why I hate remembering my dreams.
They bring up emotions long forgotten.
They bring about a happiness that I can never have.
They brought about a hope that was entirely false,
and I when I wake and remember these dreams,
It's like crushing me all over again...
and I am begging to be saved.

But still this begging means nothing,
because in the near future I won't feel these things anymore.
I won't feel anything anymore,
because somehow I have managed to effectively shut down all emotions that may attempt to seep out.
I don't feel strongly about anything anymore.
The passion is gone,
and everything I feel, see, and do is just me killing time.
I don't enjoy myself anymore.
There's nothing in this world for me to enjoy,
though there's a whole world out there that I would have loved once upon a broken dream.

This can't be all there is.
This can't be it.

Hey Jude... Smile

People want reasons, beliefs, love, war, peace, fights, pain, aches, drugs, life, happiness, sadness, depression, creation, destruction, demolition, convolution, conversation, music, time, hopes, dreams, everything.

When was the last time anyone just sat back,
watched the world.
Studied it and enjoyed it.
Smiled.
Cried.

Why should it be so hard?
So harsh?
So terrible?

It shouldn't.

I will change everything through nothing.
I will just be.
Think of me and smile.
Think of me...
and just be.

You'll be everything to someone someday.